um, so hey...

So I haven't blogged in a weekish.
because EVERYTHING IS SUPER CRAZY BUSY.
And it'll be worse next week.
Just keeping my readers (there are like, 2 people who read this) updated.
goodnight.

and if you feel discouraged, well there's a lack of color here.

It's raining. I love the rain, an obnoxious amount. It makes me want to curl up in a chair with a cup of coffee. I feel the need to wear something black and a scarf on rainy days. I've been doing that since middle school. I would wear my totally hip and indie black turtleneck (lame, i know) with my tacky sparkly scarf. it's gotten better. no worries. now it's plaid scarves and black v neck t-shirt.

Rain also gives me an excuse to carry an umbrella. I love umbrellas. I don't even know why.
This morning i walked to class with an umbrella, black top and scarve, and Death Cab on my ipod. It was a good, chill moment. I feel like i prefer simple, chill moments like that than chaotic and constant movement.

I don't know. that's it. yay rain!
I'm going to go meet Calin for dinner. then i'm going to nap because i might be getting sicky. :(
more later? maybe Will will blog (hint hint)
goodbye. for now.

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go? And would you miss me when you get there?

so, it's amazing outside today. it's warm. it's sunny. I feel no need to wear my constricting wool coat. spring is finally, after many months, starting to bubble to the surface. i know today is just a preview for march and april, and it's going to be 30 degrees tomorrow, but it's alot better than -12 degrees.
seriously.

anywho, i had a good weekend. i hung out with miss calin blevins at her humble abode in hudsonville. we saw her high school put on Grease, ate alot of food, Watched some movies and T.V, went shopping, saw movies...
it was nice. it was relaxing.
yesterday was an alright day. I went to class and then went to CAB. I was exhausted last night, so I slept through my alarms/wake up texts this morning. Good thing Sangren is right next door.

I have nothing of real interest to day...
haha
I'm just excited that it's warm.
there are things i want to accomplish this spring while on campus...

here's a list.

1. picnic/take pictures of east campus
2. walk downtown
3. hit up the den for a denpop
4. lay under a tree on a sunny day
5. splash in puddles in rain boots
6. buy fresh flowers for my dorm
7. take a midnight walk and sit by Miller fountian
8. write outside
9. jog around campus
10. feed the ducks on the pond
11. slurpees

WMU's campus is wonderful during all the seasons. :) I love it.

but, alas I need to be responsible too. so here's my spring to-do list

1. spring cleaning galore
2. apply for fafsa
3. apply for scholarships
4. get a job
5. start packing/take half of my stuff home for spring break
6. midterms and exams
7. got to 2 poetry readings
8. edit my stories before my portfolio is due
9. work out, get in better shape
10. establish a major...

...not as fun. booo.

anywho, it's tuesday. the weather is making up for the general shittiness of tuesdays.
I'm going to go do my hair then eat lunch with my roommate.
Alvin Ailey dance thing tonight.
yaaay

-Lyndsey

When I Find Myself In Times Of Trouble, Mother Mary Comes To Me, Speaking Words of Wisdom: "Let It Be"

Well this week has been really long, but really short at the same time. And I have no idea how that would ever work, but it was... And that makes no sense at all. So, I don't know. I do know that I've been kind of busy, so sorry for not posting sooner. So wanna hear about my week? Oh, yes I know you do... Let's face it, if you're reading this blog, you probs don't have much else to do. Haha. Okay so here we go:



Monday:

So Monday morning, I went on random adventures with my dad, ya know, instead of school. So I woke up an hour later than normal and went to Caribou, my dad buys something from Caribou literally every day, that seems like money that we could be saving.... And then after that we went to my orthodontist appointment. After that we went to this one little breakfast place we go to kinda often and I don't know where it is exactly... but yeah. So after that, we went down to Pontiac so I could get my tickets for AP Tour (which I'm pretty excited for). Then I went to school, and half the day was already over, I liked it. Well on Monday I also found out that my school district is in $7.5 million of a budget defecit, so they have to, ya know, come up with that much savings. And they were thinking they might make some cuts to the theatre program. And I was super pissed. So I spent my Monday evening getting the word out and trying to organize people to speak at this meeting thing the next day and to fill out a survey on this website, and support theatre and stuff. However, I could have spent a tich less of my time worrying about that, and a tich more time helping Lyndsey with some of the things she needed help with. So just in case you haven't figured it out, I was the said individual... But yeah, my self-centeredness is starting to be a problem. A BIG problem... I reallly need to work on that. And I don't think anyone expects me to change, but I should, and I don't think it would be right for me to be of the mind set that just because I've always been that way, it doesn't matter and I'll keep being that way. No, I need to change... I'll let you know how that's going....



Tuesday:
So Tuesday, I went to school, and rehearsal was canceled for the budget meeting thing. Well let me rephrase: The dance and acting rehearsals were canceled, the singing rehearsal (the one I was supposed to be at) was not, because the choir director is a cunt face. But I didn't go. I had more important things to do. So I went to this meeting thing, let me take a moment to clarify: The meeting was not just about cutting theatre's budget. It was the whole budget cut thing in total. There were about 75 items that they were looking at, theatre was only affected by 4. Okay so, I went to this meeting with the other theatre kids, and we made up about half of the people that showed up. And half of the people that spoke too. It was kind of funny how we just bombarded them with theatre, theatre, theatre, cuz we all went in a row to speak. So anyway, I was the first student called up, the first theatre speak called up, like the third person in total called up. I was a tich nervous, but good for me, I wrote down my thoughts, so I wouldn't be nervous. And I tried to add a bit of humor into it, and hopefully that worked? Okay, also let me stop to say this. Everyone knew I wanted to speak there. I was very adament that I wanted to speak. But the body language I got from everyone was "Fuck, I really hope he doesn't speak." And I don't get why. I mean, I know I wasn't the best speaker. But I didn't screw it up. I didn't make them want to cut theatre more from my speech. I mean what the fuck?! Ugh, that just really bothered me. I just want to know why everyone was so skeptical.... Anyway. So we spoke at the meeting, I think we were well received. After that I went to Nick's house. We ate pizza and really weird/awesome brownies. We played Halo. For 2 and a half hours. Haha, I felt really unproductive and lame, but awesome at the same time. I am so terrible at Halo, but I love that game. After that we started watching Mary Poppins, (yeah, you heard me, its a good movie okay?) which I had never seen before, until my mom came to pick me up.... Anyone want to finish watching that movie with me? haha.

Wednesday:
I don't remember anything particularly eventful happening on Wednesday..... I umm went to school. Went to rehearsal. And came home. Did homework........ That's probably about the extent of my Wednesday....

Thurdsay:
Pretty similar to Wednesday.....

Friday:
Well I got home from rehearsal. It was Friday night. So I start calling people trying to find out what I was going to do that night. Well, I made the discovery that I don't have that many friends. :( I was part of that one group for like two months, and I'm pretty sure I was just the Karen the whole time. (Dane Cook y/n?) I'm not invited to any of the get togethers any more. And it kinda sucks. And I hate not being part of a group. I guess I should just get over it. I have Lyndsey. And I have Bethany. And I can hang out with them without having to be a part of a group.... But still, it sucks. Oh well..... So yeah, I spent my Friday night... watching T.V.......

Saturday:
Saturday was an adventuresome day. I quite enjoyed it. I woke up and had Becca drive me to Adams to meet Sally for a can drive for Habitat for Humanity that some of the German clubbers were doing. (I just kinda went along for the ride, cuz I wanted to hang out with them) So we drove around, got cans from our friends houses, and rang doorbells of strangers to get cans and such. So we go to Busch's and find out that like a shit ton of the bottles we have aren't returnable (mainly the IBC bottles I brought from my house) so that sucked. and we ended up getting like $7... booooo. So then Paige called, who had told me that she didn't think she had any bottles when I called her, and said that she in fact, had a shit ton of bottles. So we were all like Yay! maybe another 3 bucks to round us off. So we get there. And Paige opens the garage, and there are bags of cans and bottles going up and down the side of her garage. Like $10 worth. Go her! and we also stopped at Sabrina's house to get some, and we ended up with like another $13 to make 20. That's pretty good right?.... Well it's not as horrible as $20. So then Becca dropped me off at Paige's house to hang out with her. So when I got there, we decided we should go to my house. Because it was empty, and that never happens at my house. So we played Guitar Hero and chatted, and ate a lot of Chex Mix. We decided to go meet Bethany at Caribou, so we did that and we sat there and talked for a while. While we were there Sally called us and asked to go to the Village, and we told her we'd leave soon and call her when we do. So we call her 45 minutes later, when we start heading over, but she didn't answer. So we just drive around for a while, waiting for her to call us back. When she does, we find that she is on a walk with her dog, and we come to pick her up, for we were driving around her neighborhood. So she and her dog get in the car, and we drive her the rest of the way home. She tells us to head over to the village, she'll tell her parents where she's going and follow us up there. So we get there, we sit in the Starbucks parking lot waiting for her, and then I get a text saying that she has to go out to dinner with her family and can't come. So then, we were like, "well fuck. what do we do now?" So I called Bethany again, and we went back over to her house. While there, I get a call from my mom saying that she has to come pick me up at 7:15 so that she could talk to all the kids at once. Well that could mean a lot of things. So the three of us ponder what it could be (cuz my mom wouldn't tell me on the phone) and Paige goes back home for dinner shortly after. Me and Bethany talk, at 7:15 I go home to find out what this thing is. My mom sits us all down and tells us that we are going to have regular family meetings so that we can improve our family dynamic. So I'm not sure how these are going to work out. They could be helpful, or they could be stupid and a pain. Only time will tell. After that Bethany's sister Olivia came with her to come pick me up, and take me back over to their house. I played board games with Bethany, Olivia, and her friend Lauren (who is fucking awesome, just btw) and they drove me back home later. And I watched SNL, and fell asleep. And that was my day. Thrilling huh? Well not really... but I enjoyed it... yup thats it... So hopefully this rediculously long post makes up for my lack of blogging this week?

-Will

LAME.

Will hasn't written anything in a week. I've been writing like crazy.
He needs to write. Will, if you read this, you need to write. k thanks.
:)

that's it.
goodnight.

-lyndsey.

So I say we'll set this world on fire.

I am officially in love with Mercy Mercedes.

just, FYI




Oh Hey! a Poem!
that's much more optimistic than the previous.


let's run.
run through the streets, down to the river.
dancing, laughing the whole way.
let's dance.
dance through the city.
let the colored lights sparkle in our eyes.
let's drive.
drive to somewhere new.
somewhere where they can't catch us,
where we can have this all unfold.
let's sing.
sing until our voices grow hoarse.
until our throats turn raw and all we can manage is a whisper.
let's watch.
watch the sky grow darker.
filling up with unmade wishes and spinning stars.
let's dream.
eyes closed, determination in our hearts.
rest our heads with the vision of our names in headlines.
let's listen
let the music surround us, capture our hearts.
placing a melody inside, a rythym for life.
So c'mon, let's grab our coats and shoes.
grab that mix tape, and leave a note.
we're leaving through that open door.
let's go.
let's dance.
let's dream.
for something real, something more.



Going to Calin's for the weekend, I shall update on sundayyyy.

-Lyndsey

much better today.

so, today was a whole lot better than every other day this week.

beecaauuussseeeeee


1. Bamb-fucking-boozle road show! fuck! Will and I are going! It's official! and, Epic!
;flns;lnsl;sn;lnl; shit im excited

2. My 2nd short story was a little bit better than the first

3. I worked out today.

4. It's thursday

5. They had the spinach dip stuff in the caf.

6. my hair is being super nice

7. I'm venturing to Calin's homefront tomorrow

8. It's the weekend

9. One weekend closer to spring break

10. I only have one class tomorrow

11. I got my homework done at 1 pm, yes PM today

um, that's basically it. i'm sleepy. so i'm going to...sleep.

goodnight!

wha-whaaat?

hahahaha
my last poem thing makes no sense.
aka-i should never be allowed to write past 2 am.

poem that doesn't make sense because it's 2 am and i hate holistics.

the two o clock hour is threatening me
i chose to wait, again.
i'm too tired to think of anything with substance.
but i can't sleep. so i sit awake, and think of faded memories
"do you remember?" is the phrase in my head on repeat
like an overplayed song on the radio.



sweet perfume dances through the air, reminding me of summertime
the sunny days, the careless nights
less work, easier times.
so much has changed through these past few months.
the summer fades like photographs, bleached out by it's own blinding light.
it will come again, i promise
but the discomfort of winter still prevails, it never seems to weaken
the flakes that once danced gracefully have turned violent
the cool breeze is now piercing
the clouds of breath have become a fog.
this blizzard keeps blinding me
when the sun shines through, i run, only to find another avalanche.
it's too cold to care, too numb

but summer will come, it will be warm again.
the light will break though
the branches will blossom, the flowers will bloom
we will dance again, and the sky will be bright again
there will be light in our eyes again
the nights will be full of stars, not snow
our days filled with love, not lonliness.
the dawn will break.
but it will just take a little bit longer
for this numb to fade
for this ice to thaw
for the snow to melt
and to be free.

But he thinks its just one more sunset.

I blog alot more than Will does. but probably have less time to.
whatever.


I've had and awful day so far.

Well, I mean on the grand scheme of things, it was just kind of crappy, but I like to be dramatic and girly, it was awful. shall we start the complaining? yes

I woke up at 7ish after falling asleep around 3. my evening last night was filled frustrating writer's block and just a bad attitude all around. I hate feeling so negative about things but I get super moody and cranky when I can't think of anything to write.
Anywho, i woke up around 7 for my 8:00 class. I got dressed, put on some makeup, etc. first of all, I look like shit. I'm the type of person who wants everything to be visually appealing, and when something about my isn't visually appealing, I get frustrated. I know that sounds shallow, but it's one of my flaws that tends to kick my ass.
Then I went to go brush my teeth in the bathroom and I turned on the sink and the water is, in fact, brown. Wow, thank you WMU. So I had to wait until after class to brush my teeth and make sure the water would be clear.
I went to class and it was all about mind-body connection. and of course, we meditated, but I couldn't today. Every time I closed my eyes another worry, memory, or chore would pop up in my mind. It didn't help that I thought I had a huge project due this morning and I thought i had forgot about it. good thing it's due thursday....
so my body did the whole "fight-flight?" thing? where your body is on guard because you're so stressed so that you become all tense and your heart races and stuff...well apparently that happened. And I've been anxiety filled and shakey and worried all day because of that. Apparently after that wears off you crash and are completely exhausted. awesome. That'd be alright if, you know...I had time to sleep.
After class I came back and attempted to write my story, but grew frustrated with my writing and had another whopping round of writer's block. I also was growing frustrated with the smell of my room (hot sauce and cinnamon room spray and popcorn...yum?) and certian individuals who...well...were being frustrating. ugh. whatever. I'm still a titch mad and frustrated with said inviduals, but it's not like anything is going to change.
At least my Geo lab was easy. Identifying rocks isn't too difficult. But I got back from my Lab and I realized I forgot to eat today...but I don't have time. which sucks too. And I have no appetite. I don't know. I think I'm on the verge of my first, real, college level breakdown.
I think I'm just really frustrated with myself. I keep stuff bottled inside, I'm majorly flawed. I have alot of issues that may be beginning to bubble to the surface.

welcome to college....

-Lyndsey.

And I borrow phrases, from dusty, faded, record sleeves...

...The story is the same.I've just personalized the name.




I don't have much to say. I'm going to complain. get the fuck over it. it's my turn for once.

It's 1:19 am.
I'm frustrated with my writing.
I have class at 8 am
my short story is due at 6 pm tomorrow
my computer may/probs has a virus because of tainted the rocket summer files.
I in fact, have no money
Theatre may be cut out at the schools at home.
My hair is frizzy.
My room smells like hot sauce
Tomorrow is tuesday
My best friend is mad at me/ I'm mad at him
I'm too fiesty.
I'm sick of caf food.
It's snowing.
I have no appetite. again.
My writing class makes me self concious.
My clothes are all uncomfortable
My boots have huge salt stains.
I have writer's block galore.
This was stupid....and self centered. and bitchy.
WHATEVER. I'm allowed to do that once in a while.
fuck.


this was stupid. like i said. and will porbably be deleted soon.
goodnight.


-Lyndsey

P.S.

Make Will happy, Poll it up.


the poll not on the side with the ridiculous amount of album names, not an actual metal rod.


but they're not the same seeing the thing on the side is p-o-l-l, and the metal rod is p-o-l-e

whatever, just do it.
:)

-Lyndsey

pack your things, we'll skip this town.

I enjoy a weekend at home. and it was a balmy 35 degrees today. too bad I feel like a luxury liner train hit me.

anywho, my weekend was lovely! I got on the train on friday afternoon. Get this, the train pulled up to the station, and it was a classy, double decker train! that train was the shit! they had recliner seats with footrests and everything! amtrack is getting classy.
on the train i sat next to a salty, starbucks sipping-angry-that-his-writing-talents-are-wasted-on-writing-for-the-man-and-not-the-revolution-and-likes-to-rock-a-soul-patch middle aged man. ugh. i ignored him for the duration of his trip, but i was writing and i felt like he was reading my writing and silently judging me. but, you know. whatever. after i felt his peering eyes i decided a nap was a better option.
friday night I had a girly night with Kelsey. Twas quite fun. We had dinner at Noodles and Co (classy dining according to Jack Barakat. yes, i just made a jack barakat reference.) and caught up on the happenings of Rochester and Kalamazoo. After this we grabbed starbucks and walked around the village, ate fries in McDonald's parking lot, then went to a late movie. :)

Saturday was a fun day. I woke up, showered, ate, the usual. Will came over. We hung out at my house for a bit. I made him hot chocolate because i felt like I needed to in my outfit. I was wearing sweater boots and a big Grandpa Cardigan. I felt it was appropriate. Then Arielle called so we both talked to her on speaker phone. that was fun. I miss her too much.
After this we ventured to Parisian with my mom and then Lipuma's for delicious fries. haha.
We returned home, made a mix tape for january, drove around and listened to said mix tape, bought brownie mix, made brownies....they were tasty!
after that, well, kids, you read Will's blog. that wasn't fun. Well, it was fun, I think...until things got too sloppy for my liking. and it just grew exhausting and I was tired and Will wasn't doing too well and i felt bad. geez...never again.
haha. good lord. we're lame.

But today was an..alright day. I woke up and ventured to Panera for breaky with Valerie. I didn't feel too good so I just kind of picked at my sandwich, but it was nice to catch up with Val. this whole not seeing each other for months thing is a bitch. I love that with Val we can just sit and talk for hours or go cause mayhem in Chicago. No matter what, it's always fun. We're both pretty damn pumped for the Fall Out Boy concert. (and p.s. Will, you wouldn't be a burden at all. psh) Cobra is the one band she has been dying to see so Val's pretty psyched. and i think All Time Low again is something i can definitely handle. and oh yeah, that other band, fall out boy will be there too. ;)
Good things are beginning to come about. "it's all happening"

Anywho, after breakfast with Valerie, I packed up my things and cleaned my room. then met Will at Caribou for coffee and then walked around the Village. well...whole foods. haha. God, I miss that kid already. being away from him for months at a time, like I said with Valerie, is a huge bitch. really, who else am I going to walk around a grocery store for a half an hour and make it fun? ugh. why must kalamazoo be so far away? lame. no deal michigan, no deal.

I visited my grandparents briefly today before i went to the train station. that was nice. I love them. I think over spring break I'm going to spend the night there a couple of times, just because. They're fun. I miss them when I'm at school.

The train bringing me back to Kalamazoo was a luxury liner too. classy! Krystal got on in Ann Arbor and we sat (and reclined in our luxury seats!) and talked. then we watched Beauty and The Beast on her lappy. Then we got Wendy's when we got back to Kzoo.
I was greeted by a door decoration of a picture of Jack Barakat when i got back to my room. haha. we had to put down our "celebrity crush", even though 54 people know who the hell he is.
but it made me smile, regardless. haha.

I've been sitting at my laptop making to do lists for the week and trying to think of short story ideas. I'm too tired to think of anything good. I'll write tomorrow.
mondays are lame, but not nearly as lame as tuesdays...

that's pretty much it.

playlist....

february air-lights
shiksa (girlfriend)-say anything
lullabies-all time low
up, up, and away-romance on a rocketship
trouble-nevershoutnever

goodnight all.

-Lyndsey.

I'll never let you go. Don't ever forget. Tell me you'll remember. Forever young.

I have had an... interesting weekend. Lyndsey came home. I spent the day with her yesterday. And I saw her again breifly today. Ummm I don't even know where to start with this..... Well....

Me and Bethany had another fight, that we resolved today. I hate fighting with her. It takes a toll on me emotionally, and they always end up being something dumb, like a major miscommunication. Idk, it's just sad when we fight. I don't like it.

Ummm I engaged in some unadvisable activities with Lyndsey last night. I threw up three times at her house. Ugh, that's going on the list of things I'm giving up for Lent.

Speaking of, I'm giving up meat for Lent. Its gonna be very difficult. My mom thinks I don't take care of myself. I know she's kind of right, and I should take better care of myself, but I don't think that I treat myself badly.... She thinks I don't eat... I should eat more... Its a problem.

I miss Lyndsey... again. Haha. She needs to come home for longer durations of time... I don't have anything to say, well no that's a lie, I just don't want to type it all out.... I probably should though.... I just need an idea of where to start....

I guess at the beginning? After school on Friday, I went to the ticketmaster place at FYE at Great Lakes, because my mom won't use her credit card for anything, it's weird. So I went to check if Believers Never Die Tour was sold out for the floor, which it was. So that sucks. Because I wanted to go to that with Lyndsey. But it's probs for the best, cuz she's going with her other friend Val, and I don't want to intrude, and I probs would be if I went with them. Ahhh well.... I got a ticket for Bamboozle Road Show, and I'm going to get one for AP tour hopefully tomorrow (they don't sell them on ticket master apparently). So I have to go to the Crofoot to get it.

HSUg;lhda,us! A really good song just came on my iTunes. It's called Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright. It is sooooooo good! It's from the Shrek soundtrack, lol. A bunch of the theatre kids sing it a lot, because Jim can play it on the piano and he does that a lot.... And, side note, when I went to go see Paramore last fall, when they started their song called Hallelujah, Hayley sang the first verse of this song first, it was awesomeeee! Here are the lyrics, in case you want them:

I've heard there was a secret chord,
that David played and it pleased the Lord.
But you don't really care for music, do you?

It goes like this: the fourth; the fifth
The minor fall; the major lift
The baffled King composing Hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah

Your faith was strong, but you needed proof.
You saw her bathing on the roof.
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you.

She tied you to a kitchen chair.
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair.
And from your lips she drew the hallelujah.

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah

Maybe I've been here before.
I've seen this room, I've walked this floor.
I used to live alone, before I knew you.

I've seen your flag on the marble arch.
Love is not a victory march.
It's a cold and its a broken hallelujah.

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah

There was a time when you let me know
What's real and going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?

And remember when I moved in you
The Holy Dark was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah

Maybe there's a God above
And all I ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you

And it's not a cry you can hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah

Idk... I just like that song.... it reminds me of Nick. Haha, well that's enough for now, i guess. I think I'm gonna post more often starting now. I should, idk. I need to get more comfortable at venting through this thing. Haha. Peace out.

-Will

P.S. I posted a new poll. Please vote on it. And just btw, I forgot to put the artist on the album "It Won't Be Soon Before Long," well its Maroon 5, in case you wanted to know. :)